Would You Hire You?

Can we talk candidly with each other for a moment this morning?  Forget about everyone else, right now it’s just you and me.  Friends, talking over a drink outside the four walls of the office.  You know the setting, a place where you and I can get real and honest with each other without consequence or retribution.

You good with that?

Great.  I wanted to ask you a question that I was challenged with this past week.  And the more I thought about it the more intrigued I got about the idea.

Would you hire you to do the job you currently do?

It’s a question that the more I ponder, the more relevant it has become.

Last week we discussed the idea of leaving a mark, and I’ve since added the idea of seizing the moment to that on my own personal journey, but along the way I’ve recognized that if I’m not up to the task of doing what I’m supposed to be doing, I’ve got some adjustments that need to be made before I’m situated to leave that mark.

Which raises the notion that if I wouldn’t hire me to do what I’ve been hired to do, were did the breakdown occur and what steps am I taking to correct it.  In other words, if on a daily basis I am in effect simply phoning it in and not giving it my all - why on earth should I continue to get paid to simply half-ass the effort I’m bring paid money to do.

The fact is, if we aren’t giving it our all, we are not only letting ourselves down but those around us as well.  And I for one don’t want to be the topic of conversation as others sit around drinks each night bemoaning the fact that we aren’t carrying our fair share of the workload.  I don’t want to be the one singled out for subpar performance.

I want to be the one setting the world on fire and tackling each and every task as if my life depended on it.  To accomplish that means I need to be giving my all - all the time.  I know that seems unrealistic, and in some cases it probably is.  But what I know is absent that desire the throws of mediocrity will quickly set it meaning your role within your role quickly becomes marginalized with others most likely having to pick up the slack.

I’ve got a friend who recently shared with me how annoyed they were as a co-worker spends most of their day tackling the mind numbing chore of managing  fantasy sports teams.  This really irritated my friend as this co-worker was a cohort on a project that bore both their names.  

As we dove deeper into the discussion, my friend revealed that their co-worker had never even set themselves up on a particular software program needed to complete the project meaning my friend ended up completing most of the project.  

Getting down to the brass tacks revealed that most, if not all the frustration with this co-worker was predicated on that fact that at the completion of the project both names would appear even though one did the majority of the work.  

I don’t know about you, but for me being that other person who slacks off is not a role I want to assume.

So let me ask you the question again this time within the context of our conversation here.  Would you hire you to do the job you are currently doing?

If the answer is, “Yes”,  Great.  If the answer is, “No”, what things do you need to start doing today to effect the change necessary to change that No to Yes?

It may not seem like a hard question but it is a needed challenge.  This week, spend time making sure that job you are doing is meeting or exceeding the job you were hired to do.  And if it isn’t, make this the week to start the change.

*****

Personal Success Coach is pleased to offer coaching packages starting at $299 per month.  Each session is intentional and deliberately designed with you in mind to address the issues important to you taking you from where you are in life to where you want to be.

Leaving Your Mark

I have a secret to share with you all today, in fairness it’s not secret to those who know me well, but for you all it will come as new information.  It’s nothing bad, more of a guilty pleasure, a calorie free guilty pleasure which in my book means its good.  

I love to watch trains as they pass by.  I love the sound of the steel on steel, the clinging, the hissing, the clacking, the raw power as the locomotives pull past and the ground around them rumble in response.  There is just something majestic about watching a train rumble down the tracks, the sights and sounds and smells that accompany the train for me are fantastic.

I’m also very fortunate to live in a town that has a vibrant economy with a CSX line that runs through the center of town.  Given our close proximity to the Nissan factory means that on any given day you are just as likely to see a train carrying brand new cars from the factory as you are seeing a coal train rumbling by on its way to deliver its freight that will keep the power plant running.

When I’m out driving and time allows, there are 2-3 places along the track that I know I can safely park and observe the train up close.  When my daughter was younger we would make a point to stop at least once a week and “catch a train” as she would refer to it.  It was something that we shared together, and as she’s gotten older I miss those times we had to spend together.

Last week I was with my wife as she was getting her hair done, and the salon we both visit sits across the street from the Smyrna Train Depot.  It is not uncommon to see multiple trains pass by, and the stylist we both use knows that when a train is coming he’ll actually turn the chair so that I can look out the window to see the train pass by while he’s cutting my hair.  (Perhaps there’s a lesson there we can address on another week!)

As I waited while her hair was being done, a train whistle could be heard off in the distance meaning I made my way outside the building to watch for the oncoming train.  As it approached I noticed it had 4 locomotives which meant it was probably going to be a long train, in excess of a mile long or more as is typical on this particular line.

As the cars passed by, I started to pay special attention to the graffiti that adorned so many of the cars.  I’ve never really paid a lot of attention to graffiti in the past, but as this particular train passed by I saw that there was something beautiful about the amount of attention the artists had paid in creating their mark on life.  Let me be clear, I’m not here to argue the legality of the graffiti or the fact that it is in fact vandalism, rather I was focused on the attention given as those who created it sought to create their mark on life.

All to often I think we get stuck in the mundane, and we fail to create a mark on our own lives.  I encourage you to not overthink this one today, this isn’t the life altering leave a legacy type of discussions we’ve had in the past.  Nope, todays challenge is simply this.  Much like those graffiti artists who spend their time, talent and resources to create their mark that ultimately is here today, gone tomorrow - that lasting indelible mark has the possibility of affecting others in the days, weeks and years to come - assuming it isn’t painted over by the next ambitious artist.

Let me ask you this, if you had the opportunity to leave a mark, even if short term, on the lives of those around you - be it co-workers, friends or family - would you take it?  Do you have the confidence to step out and create change with those you work with, even if just short term or otherwise mundane or perhaps trivial, can you do it?

As I watched that train pass by I was awestruck on how much time and planning had gone into some of the different markings on the side of the train cars.  The fiscal side of me took note of how much money in some cases had been spent simply acquiring the paint necessary to complete the different works of art.  On one hand it seems like a tremendous waste of time and talent, but on this particular day I didn’t see it that way.  

I found myself wanting to know more about the person behind the art.  What was it that they saw that they needed others to see in creating their masterpiece.  What mark where they seeking to make, what statement was being portrayed that I was missing.

Here’s the truth.  Not everything you do in life will be life changing or remembered forever.  However, how difficult would it be to create lots of small events that effect those around you, that leave those whom you come into contact with wondering why you did what you did but appreciating the fact that you did it.  

I don’t know about you, but I think if you start creating a lot of small life changing events that you leave your mark on in your sphere of influence, they’ll quickly morph into bigger larger opportunities to create real life changing life altering events.  For me, if you can start doing that, just like me wanting to know the story behind the graffiti I’ll want to know your story as well.

So go on, leave your mark today.  Others will be glad you did.

*****

Personal Success Coach is pleased to offer coaching packages starting at $299 per month.  Each session is intentional and deliberately designed with you in mind to address the issues important to you taking you from where you are in life to where you want to be.

You Can't Spell "TEAM" Without "M E"

Are you a team player?  It’s a question that is thrown around far too easily, the phrase appears on resumes and LinkedIn profiles at such a prolific rate, I’m not sure most people actually stop and think about the implications of truly being a team player.  

And then there is the old cliche, “There is no “I” in team”, and fun little nugget that for the most part is fundamentally wrong.  While there is no “I” in the word team, the fact is you can’t spell team without including ME - or you.  

So let’s start this over, and really ask the question, are you a team player?  

I was talking with a friend of mine who is part of a team at work whose focus is developing new processes to deal with a specific issue involving employees.  I can’t get into the details as to the project, but you don’t need to know them to get a handle on the bigger issue.

The team consists of two people.  My friend and one other.  The issue revolves around the fact that the one other isn’t making an active effort to contribute to the team to accomplish the goals that were set out for the team to accomplish.  The team itself is seeking to solve a real issue within the company, but at this moment in time only one of the two members of the team are actively engaged in the process of finding solutions.

And frustration is building as this project is just one of many my friend is tasked with working on, and the need to devote a disproportional amount of time to pick up the slack left by the other team mate opens up the potential the my friends participation on the other projects will suffer.

In considering this topic, there are several key ideas that I think we all can learn from this week and apply to our own lives and the interactions we have with those we come into contact with.

#1. If you are part of a team, it is important for the “ME” to shine, contributing as much as possible to see that the stated goals of the team are accomplished.

#2. Failing to bring yourself fully to the team means others on the team will have to pick up the slack you are creating.  You don’t want those other team members going home at night complaining about your lack of contribution.

#3. If you lack direction or knowledge within your role on the team, ASK for help and guidance.  I promise you others will be glad to help you succeed because their success is hinged on your success and vice versa.

#4. If you are leading a team, set expectations.  If you are a member of the team, ask what expectations are expected from you.  And return to those expectations often, as they often develop and change over time.

Think of your participation on a team from a very second grade school yard kind of perspective.  Just like kids being chosen for a kickball or dodgeball team, those who excel always get chosen before those who don’t.  Now granted, maybe you like myself weren’t the most athletic of kids, but as an adult it is not uncommon for me to be asked to join a team as those asking know that if I join the team, the team will get all of ME meaning the team as a whole has a much high likelihood of success.

When you give your all, the full ME to the team, you set yourself apart and make yourself more valuable to not only that team, but the company or organization itself.

So the challenge this week is to make sure that you always, always, always, bring the full ME to the TEAM you are on.

*****

Personal Success Coach is pleased to offer coaching packages starting at $299 per month.  Each session is intentional and deliberately designed with you in mind to address the issues important to you taking you from where you are in life to where you want to be.

My Response Was Wrong

Can we get honest with each other for a few minutes this morning?  You know what I mean, just you and I talking honestly, being transparent with each other.  Is that OK with you?

Great!  If you don’t mind, let me go first.  

Here goes, I’ve got to be honest with you, I had a rough start to the weekend.  I was trying to finish a project that demanded use of some new programs I had never used before.  The hard work had been done for several days, the final step though required using a new to me software program and despite watching not only the software developer supplied support videos and FAQ’s, as well as multiple other videos found on YouTube demonstrating the process - it just wouldn’t work for me.

I even found one support video that had the software running on a MacBook Pro, following every step offered in that video still resulted in me not being able to duplicate the results as shown in the video.

Here is where the honesty comes in, I was beyond frustrated.  I was annoyed, I was angry, I was perturbed to think that instead of using common upload and presentation tools this project demanded the use of an obscure program that offered no tangible benefit over other commonly used programs instead lending frustration to the process.

And I failed.  

I failed big time.  

In my frustration in not being able to complete what I was working on, I took my frustration out in reaction to my family.  My wife summoned me to help her with something, and I allowed the annoyance of the project I was struggling with to affect me reaction to her - and she got mad at me.  

And I deserved it.  No doubt about it.  

I was a jerk in the way I responded.

And I was wrong.

In the heat of the moment I allowed a stupid program on a computer located someplace far far away to cloud my judgment and influence my reactions to others.  My response to my wife was wrong, the cause of which had nothing to do with her or the issue she was inquiring of me about.

As I ate crow and begged for forgiveness, I realized that there was a lesson there that I needed to be reminded of this week.  Maybe its something you need to hear as well.

How often do we allow influences from one area of life to cloud our judgment in other areas? 

How often do we allow that influence to affect negatively other aspects of our life?  

If we are being honest with each other, my guess would be that our answer is, “more often than we’d like it to be.”

And within our honesty is a lesson I know I need to be reminded of, but perhaps you need to be reminded of as well this week.  It’s not that we won’t face challenges or hurdles - its how we handle and respond to those challenges or hurdles that defines us.  Within the context of my weekend, I failed in my response.  I had to walk back my reaction and apologize to my wife.  Thankfully I have a super cool wife who forgives, and that initial start to the weekend was quickly put behind us and we finished strong.

That project I was working on is another story.  I’ve submitted all the supporting files along with an apology (and several screen shots showing my results) stating I was unable to get the project to load on the specific platform.  I’ll have to wait and see how that ultimately shakes out - but at least for me - I was reminded in a powerful way that the way I act and react matters.

As you start this week, I know you will face issues that will bring you to a crossroads of reaction.  Don’t fail the process like I did this past weekend.  Take a minute and take a step back.  Draw in a deep breath and be reminded that what you do next can influence the rest of your day or the balance of your week.  The person(s) you are responding to may not be as kind and understanding as my wife was with me this weekend.

Have a great week, we’ll meet back here next week and celebrate our victories.

*****

Personal Success Coach is pleased to offer coaching packages starting at $299 per month.  Each session is intentional and deliberately designed with you in mind to address the issues important to you taking you from where you are in life to where you want to be.

Saying No Is Hard To Do

I had an interesting conversation last week with a friend of mine.  We were discussing different people we encounter throughout the course of our weeks, and based on some high level conversation it would appear that we both ran into the same person during the prior week, or at least the same type of person.  

The fact is, if you think back hard enough, we all probably ran into that person within the last week, and chances are we will again this week and the week after as well.  You know who I’m talking about, the one that no matter the circumstance or event life throws them, not only do they already have the answer for it but they’ll ignore the advice or counsel of others who have had similar circumstances - but have overcome them.

The conversations typically play out the same way, it starts with the “woe is me” and quickly segues into the excuse portion of the narrative followed by the “I know I should” - hold up here, this is the figurative pause that if we were speaking in person would now be occurring, so go on, wait for it while I return you to the narrative - “I know I should...   ...BUT”

And there it is, that oh so fatal word, BUT.  BUT is the word that excuses all actions and suggestion that follows.  BUT is the word that minimizes or diminishes any advice tendered.  BUT is the word that tells you that they don’t want to change their situation, just have you wallow in it with them.  BUT is the reason they will be in the same boat tomorrow, next week, next month and most likely next year.

Here’s the thing I know.  Life ain’t perfect (apparently neither is my english!), however when we allow that word BUT to cloud our judgment, we’ve just allowed ourselves the excuse necessary to justify WHY things aren’t getting better or changing.

Ouch, I’m swinging for the fences but may be hitting close to home for some of you.  So let me ask you, is BUT and excuses and cover it offers your driving force, or is making deliberate intentional change what motivates you to get up out of that situation and effect change on your life?

I titled this piece, “Saying No Is Hard To Do” for one simple reason.  When you encounter that person in your life this week, are you willing to stand by, offer the sympathetic ear, and move on once they hit the inevitable BUT in their story, or are you willing to say NO to the story and move on with your day letting them know that while sympathetic, you are aware that when the details are stripped away they are the reason they are dealing with whatever the issue of the day is.

Seem harsh?  It is.  No doubt.  Hard things in life can be harsh.  Here’s the challenge.  More than saying NO, do you have the courage to stand strong and be specific as to why you are saying NO.  Do you have the courage to speak the truth in love?  

I know, it is hard.  Life changing conversations are always hard.  If you don’t speak the truth in love, who will?  Maybe it’s not your thing, maybe this week isn’t the week to do it.  Can you do me a favor though?

Consider taking that bold step, speak truth wrapped in love.  When the inevitable BUT comes crashing down in the tale, speak up, speak boldly, say NO - and then tender advice that has the ability to effect change so that next time, there isn’t a BUT in the conversation.

Are you with me???  Feel free to comment below if you are so inclined.  I love when BUT gets turned around and changed to something along the lines of, ...and as a result of!!!

*****

Personal Success Coach is pleased to offer coaching packages starting at $299 per month.  Each session is intentional and deliberately designed with you in mind to address the issues important to you taking you from where you are in life to where you want to be.