Several weeks ago I had an opportunity to golf in a charity golf tournament that benefited my kids school. I was fortunate to get paired with a guy that I have known for close to a decade along with the drummer for a prominent country artist. It was a great day of golf (is there every really a bad day of golf?) that had the 3 of us striking up an immediate rapport along with some friendships that will last well past the afternoon of golf.
During our time together we were discussing careers and other fun stuff when one of the guys commented on a situation he was currently facing stating that he was taking control of the mess versus allowing the mess to control him. The idea isn’t foreign, but the way it was articulate made had me quickly making a note on my phone with the intent to write about it in an upcoming Monday Morning Minute.
A few years ago, I was assisting a friend of mine with whom I had fallen out of touch but then reunited after about 10 years. As we caught up on the time missed he revealed that he was in a lot of legal trouble with several lawsuits going on between him and some former business partners. Lawsuits have a funny way of snowballing, what starts as just a singular action between 2 parties often grows as different affected parties jump into the fray in an attempt to protect their own interests - and such was the case here.
All in all there were 3 or 4 different actions taking place, as when the initial business relationship broke down those affected, including employees, shareholders, and a disenfranchised landlord all filing various actions to memorialize their positions and seek to recover that which they thought they were owed.
It was a hot mess. There is an old saying when it comes to lawsuits that suggests that when people sue each other, the only people who actually win are the lawyers. This was certainly the case here, with hundreds of thousands of dollars being billed and paid to lawyers as the various actions worked their way through the court system.
I offer up these details to prove a point though, my friend who was involved had a bad habit of avoiding crisis, including the pending legal actions. Because of this, some of the items that now were being litigated could have, in theory been discussed with appropriate parties instead of being litigated, possibly (and yes, the key word is possibly) avoiding some if not all of the legal actions taking place. Based on what I was able to garner from the conversations I had along with the information learned from reading the various lawsuits, it just seemed possible that all of it could have been avoided if the issues present within the business had been faced head on in a proactive manner versus the ineffective method of hiding under a rock and hoping it would all go away.
I’m convinced in my friends case, the business was going to fail anyways. Given the industry it was in, and the complete and total meltdown of the US Economy in 2008-2012, the industry this company served slowed to a crawl so quickly, an event few if any actually saw coming or thought would happen. But it did, and the business my friend was involved with along with others failed and shuttered their doors.
What’s the lesson here? I’m glad you asked. Without oversimplifying situations, especially one that you might be facing right now, facing crisis head on is more effective than pretending it doesn’t exist or ignoring it. Or, as my golfing partner stated, take control of the mess instead of the mess controlling me [or you]. Having the ability to get out in front of an issue you are facing gives you the opportunity to mitigate the circumstance, and in some cases even control it. Furthermore, it removes some level of unknown from the process. As the business crumbled around my friend, communicating with all the affected parties could have created a situation that avoided legal remedies.
Of course, each situation is unique, but knowing and understanding that it is never a good idea to avoid that which we need to face means that facing an issue head on will, in my humble opinion, lead to a better outcome than if you don’t. To illustrate my point using my own kids, several months ago my 9-year old daughter downloaded an App that she somehow managed ended up subscribing to a paid service that was not only wanted, but one that we would never use.
When I asked her about her downloading the particular App, she repeatedly told me no denying that she had done it. I told her that I knew she had done it, and despite this she continually looked me and her mother in the eye and denied. As a result of her denial, she lost technology for 2 weeks as a punishment, and her mother and I told her that we weren’t made about the App being downloaded, on purpose or otherwise, we were mad because she lied to us about it. She certainly didn’t intend to create the mess she was in, but at that moment she recognized she was in a mess, rather than face it head on she chose to deny it. The outcome for her was much worse than if she just faced it head on and allowed it to play out.
This week I am sure you will face something that needs addressing, or perhaps you left the office Friday with something looming over your head. My encouragement to you this week is to tackle it head on, face it, address it, and ultimately seek ways to resolve it. My guess is, in a lot of cases, its a mess you made, why not take control of it before it takes control of you, I promise you that you will be glad you did.
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