Success Is More Fun Shared

Have you ever made it to the top?  Perhaps you are not sure of what I am referring to.  Have you ever made it to the top, the pinnacle of success, the peak of perhaps a career, or a life long accomplishment.  Those are the sort of ‘tops’ I am referring to.  So let me pose the question again, have you ever made it there?

Humor me, and allow me to ask another question.  When you got to the top, did you feel alone or were you surrounded by those who helped achieve that success that you now celebrate?

For me, it is a timely topic.  I recently had the opportunity to be a part of celebrating a friends success.  I, along with hundreds of other people all played a small role in their success, but in seeing them achieve that goal I can’t help but be proud to have been allowed to be a part of the process.

Success is awesome, and it is something we all seek.  Success alone however is hollow and lacks the substance that success shared with others brings.  The fact is, very rarely will a person achieve success all by themselves.  It is inevitable that many people played roles that allowed you to accomplish the things you want to accomplish.

I for one have been on both sides of that equation.  I have been fortunate to celebrate success with those who helped me achieve my goals, but likewise I have been involved as others sought the success desired for their life.

The amazing thing is both circumstances offer such fulfillment in life.  As I left the event that celebrated my friends success, I was honestly filled with pride and a true sense of accomplishment knowing that my bit role was important to the much larger picture.

Inversely, reflecting back I know that my successes in life would not have come were it not for the sacrifice and support of others invested in me and the vision outlined.  

As humans, we were not designed to do life alone.  Life is much better in community, and success simply comes as a byproduct of that community.  Are you connected in community?  Perhaps the better question might be, are you connected in community and working towards a common goal that will see you or others achieve success?

The challenge is really quite simple.  If you are the one seeking success in an area of life, embrace those that are there to support you.  And when you accomplish that item, recognize those that helped and share your joy with them.

Likewise, if you are part of someone else’s journey, embrace that time and put your all into it.  Be the person they need you to be, and do not be afraid to celebrate with them when they accomplish the item set out to be conquered.

I promise you, when you tackle life in that manner, life will reward you and truly make your life lived fuller and more complete.  And in the end, that helps to define success, no matter where you are at in your life right now.

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Personal Success Coach is pleased to offer coaching packages starting at $299 per month.  Each session is intentional and deliberately designed with you in mind to address the issues important to you taking you from where you are in life to where you want to be.

Part 1 - Why YOU Need a Coach

Good morning and happy Monday.  I don’t know about you, but I love Monday’s.  There is something special and unique about the first day of the week (OK, some of you consider Sunday the first day of the week and I’m good with that as well), so let’s call Monday the first day of the workweek.  For the next few weeks I want to dive deep into the importance of Coaching, and why YOU are probably a good candidate to work with a Coach.

This week we will deal specifically with the idea that YOU need a Coach.  First off, for all my English majors out there, I want to address the fact that I put special emphasis on the word, “YOU” by putting it in all caps.  That is intentional on my part, because for me, helping YOU become the best YOU possible is my goal.  And since the best YOU gives YOU the opportunity to serve and interact with the people in your life in the best possible way, it is paramount to me in helping you define the who, what where, when and how of making YOU the best YOU possible.

Fair enough?  Great, let’s get to it.

YOU need a Coach in your life.  How do I know this to be true?  Because YOU didn’t wake up this morning with the desire to simply “phone it in”.  Rather, I would argue that when YOU woke up this morning. the activities of the day was probably one of the many things that went through your mind.  Be it a meeting at work, or things that need to get done around the house or the office.  Perhaps it’s things that need to be done with your spouse or kids.  The list is endless in terms of what might be on it, but the reality is when YOU woke up this morning YOU started to identify the things that need to get done, be it today, tomorrow, this week or in the coming months.  

So let me ask you, are there things on the list that just seem daunting, or that YOU aren’t sure can be accomplished.  Are there things that have been put off due to fear, or hesitation, or in some cases simply because YOU just don’t want to tackle the project?  Are there things in life that YOU would like to achieve but don’t know how to get started?  My guess would be “Yes” in some capacity to all of those questions.  Let me take it a step further, do YOU want to get to the end of your life not having at least tried some of those items?  If your goal in life is to finish strong, taking that first step to get started is not only necessary, but demanded.

I never played sports in High School.  In fairness I was never very athletic with my talents lying in other areas of life.  However, the sports analogy is good in that it offers support of the concept of getting better.  It doesn’t matter how good an athlete you are, having a Coach be able to take a step back and analyze your form offering tips to make it better exponentially increases the likelihood of greater success.  Having that second set of eyes to critique and offer suggestion that leads to more efficient and effective form makes for a better performance on the sports field.

Life Coaching has the exact same effect.  Allowing a Coach who is invested in your success, who can stand back and analyze your goals and offer tips and strategies to achieve them opens up the opportunity for YOU to live your best life possible.  A Coach is a person who stands in the shadows cheering YOU on as YOU achieve new heights, meeting YOU where YOU are in life and taking YOU to where YOU want to be.

And don’t just take my word for it, I would make the argument that if working with a Coach is good enough for some of the most successful people on earth, it might be good enough for YOU.  Former President Bill Clinton and self made billionaire Oprah Winfrey are just two of hundreds of examples of people who seek the wisdom, guidance and counsel of a Coach.  

Now, here’s the thing.  Not all Coaches are the same, not all Coaches approaching coaching in the same manner.  It is important that you find a Coach that is best suited for YOU.  What YOU do not want is a Coach that attempts to fit YOU into their program versus adjusting their program to fit your needs.  I use the tagline,”...extract your best” as a foundational concept in working with a new client.  I seek to meet YOU where YOU are at and work with YOU to take YOU to where YOU want to be.  No 2 clients are the same, and as such no cookie cutter format is used.  

Using measurable benchmarks that gauge your success in achieving your stated goals creates opportunities for a better YOU - and a better YOU is a good thing.  

During the next few weeks we will touch on a few of the key components I use in my Coaching that I believe help create a better YOU.  This week I challenge YOU to jot down a few ideas in your own life that YOU think YOU could do better with the help of a Coach.  It just might surprise YOU with what you come up with.  If YOU identify somethings YOU would like to work on, let’s talk - it just might surprise YOU how much YOU are capable of if YOU choose to be intentional about it.

*****

Personal Success Coach is pleased to offer coaching packages starting at $299 per month.  Each session is intentional and deliberately designed with you in mind to address the issues important to you taking you from where you are in life to where you want to be.

Take Control of the Mess Instead of the Mess Controlling Me

Several weeks ago I had an opportunity to golf in a charity golf tournament that benefited my kids school.  I was fortunate to get paired with a guy that I have known for close to a decade along with the drummer for a prominent country artist.  It was a great day of golf (is there every really a bad day of golf?) that had the 3 of us striking up an immediate rapport along with some friendships that will last well past the afternoon of golf.

During our time together we were discussing careers and other fun stuff when one of the guys commented on a situation he was currently facing stating that he was taking control of the mess versus allowing the mess to control him.  The idea isn’t foreign, but the way it was articulate made had me quickly making a note on my phone with the intent to write about it in an upcoming Monday Morning Minute.

A few years ago, I was assisting a friend of mine with whom I had fallen out of touch but then reunited after about 10 years.  As we caught up on the time missed he revealed that he was in a lot of legal trouble with several lawsuits going on between him and some former business partners.  Lawsuits have a funny way of snowballing, what starts as just a singular action between 2 parties often grows as different affected parties jump into the fray in an attempt to protect their own interests - and such was the case here.

All in all there were 3 or 4 different actions taking place, as when the initial business relationship broke down those affected, including employees, shareholders, and a disenfranchised landlord all filing various actions to memorialize their positions and seek to recover that which they thought they were owed.

It was a hot mess.  There is an old saying when it comes to lawsuits that suggests that when people sue each other, the only people who actually win are the lawyers.  This was certainly the case here, with hundreds of thousands of dollars being billed and paid to lawyers as the various actions worked their way through the court system.

I offer up these details to prove a point though, my friend who was involved had a bad habit of avoiding crisis, including the pending legal actions.  Because of this, some of the items that now were being litigated could have, in theory been discussed with appropriate parties instead of being litigated, possibly (and yes, the key word is possibly) avoiding some if not all of the legal actions taking place.  Based on what I was able to garner from the conversations I had along with the information learned from reading the various lawsuits, it just seemed possible that all of it could have been avoided if the issues present within the business had been faced head on in a proactive manner versus the ineffective method of hiding under a rock and hoping it would all go away.

I’m convinced in my friends case, the business was going to fail anyways.  Given the industry it was in, and the complete and total meltdown of the US Economy in 2008-2012, the industry this company served slowed to a crawl so quickly, an event few if any actually saw coming or thought would happen.  But it did, and the business my friend was involved with along with others failed and shuttered their doors.

What’s the lesson here?  I’m glad you asked.  Without oversimplifying situations, especially one that you might be facing right now, facing crisis head on is more effective than pretending it doesn’t exist or ignoring it.  Or, as my golfing partner stated, take control of the mess instead of the mess controlling me [or you].  Having the ability to get out in front of an issue you are facing gives you the opportunity to mitigate the circumstance, and in some cases even control it.  Furthermore, it removes some level of unknown from the process.  As the business crumbled around my friend, communicating with all the affected parties could have created a situation that avoided legal remedies.  

Of course, each situation is unique, but knowing and understanding that it is never a good idea to avoid that which we need to face means that facing an issue head on will, in my humble opinion, lead to a better outcome than if you don’t.  To illustrate my point using my own kids, several months ago my 9-year old daughter downloaded an App that she somehow managed ended up subscribing to a paid service that was not only wanted, but one that we would never use.  

When I asked her about her downloading the particular App, she repeatedly told me no denying that she had done it.  I told her that I knew she had done it, and despite this she continually looked me and her mother in the eye and denied.  As a result of her denial, she lost technology for 2 weeks as a punishment, and her mother and I told her that we weren’t made about the App being downloaded, on purpose or otherwise, we were mad because she lied to us about it.  She certainly didn’t intend to create the mess she was in, but at that moment she recognized she was in a mess, rather than face it head on she chose to deny it.  The outcome for her was much worse than if she just faced it head on and allowed it to play out.

This week I am sure you will face something that needs addressing, or perhaps you left the office Friday with something looming over your head.  My encouragement to you this week is to tackle it head on, face it, address it, and ultimately seek ways to resolve it.  My guess is, in a lot of cases, its a mess you made, why not take control of it before it takes control of you,  I promise you that you will be glad you did.

(Did you know you can get Monday Morning Minute delivered to your inbox every Monday morning?  Go to PSCoachTN.com and register to have Monday Morning Minute waiting for you each Monday as you start your work week.)

Don’t Wait Until Next Year to Make a Resolution

We are officially 1 week into the new year - and most people who made resolutions this time last week have, statistically speaking, given up on them and reverted back to their old ways.  So whether the resolution was to lose weight, or eat better, perhaps join (or return) to the gym - the fact is we as people fail at the resolutions we make.

Why is that?  Well, for one, it takes intention to create a change.  Simply declaring that you are going to start eating healthier does not change the food you put into your body.  Clearing out the junk food from the pantry and refrigerator replacing it with healthier options is a required first step on that journey.

Losing weight is the same thing.  Although on a very basic level, losing weight is easy - eat less than what your body burns in calories everyday - the fact is it is not easy.  I for one love sweets.  When I’m engaged in a weight loss period I am intentional about the food that is brought into the house.  My whole family becomes defacto participants in my goals simply from the standpoint that I’m the one who typically does most of the grocery shopping for the house and as such I choose not to allow items that might tempt me to come into the home.

And don’t get me started on that gym.  I often joke with close friends that I have a gym membership, and I on an average day drive by that gym at least twice.  Driving by is great, stopping in and getting a workout however takes discipline.  I don’t enjoy the gym, but I also know the consequence of not getting several workouts in during the week.

As we embark on the first full week of 2019 I want to challenge you by asking this question:  What changes would you like to see accomplished in your life during the next 12 months?

I know we all gravitate to the high level simple choices, weight loss, eating better and exercise.  But beyond those, my encouragement to you this week is to really spend sometime reflecting on the changes you want to make in your life.

If you had a blank piece of paper in front of you and could draw out your life that you want for yourself, what would be there that isn’t currently part of your daily routine?  

Once you have identified those item(s), what steps are needed to start the process to get you there.  Ask yourself, are you willing to spend another year where you are at not moving yourself forward towards goals, dreams and desires that you have for your life.  If the answer is “NO” to that last question, make today the first day of your new “you” and make a resolution to change.

Life is hard, there is no argument there.  Change is harder.  It is so easy to become complacent as our lives that start out as a rut quickly turn into a grave.  Sadly, NONE of use are getting any younger, and even as you read this (and I write this) we all are closer to our final act than we were the day before.

For me, knowing the clock is ticking makes me want more.  Knowing I am on a countdown clock that is not having time added to it inspires me to seek to do the things I want to accomplish in life.  

In the last few years I’ve added some pretty aggressive resolutions to my list.  One of those resolutions was made at the beginning of 2017.  It is a 3-year plan to take one of my businesses and prepare it to be sold.  It was deliberate, it was intentional, but most importantly it was bigger than what I by myself could accomplish.  So along with my partner in that business, we created a plan.  To this day, a white board hangs in our office that counts down the months.  

As of last month, (which is month 24 of 36) we have engaged with a company that is interested in acquiring the business.  What is unknown at this point is where that conversation will lead - however what I can tell you 100% as fact is simply this - that conversation would never have occurred if a plan (resolution) wasn’t put into place at the beginning of 2017.

So this week I challenge you to start looking at making resolutions that will have a meaningful impact on your life.  Working with a Life Coach is a great way to see those goals accomplished.  Having someone who not only works with you, but can hold you accountable sets up the opportunity for success.

And at the end of the day, isn’t being successful something we all aspire to?

So go ahead, let’s ring in the New Year right by making resolutions that will make the life you are living the best possible life there is.

(Did you know you can get Monday Morning Minute delivered to your inbox every Monday morning?  Go to PSCoachTN.com and register to have Monday Morning Minute waiting for you each Monday as you start your work week.)

The $1.6 Billion Dollar Question

Stop and think for a minute and ponder the following.  For the last few weeks millions upon millions of otherwise sane and logical people have stood in line to tender their hard earned money for the chance at the opportunity to win what is now the largest jackpot ever in a government run lottery game.  The odds are stacked against the players, 1 in 330 million or some astronomical number like that.  I think you have a better chance of getting struck by lightning than you would winning the lottery - but honestly who wants to get struck by lightning.

Here is the part that fascinates me, and within that I believe a lesson in life emerges.

Ask anyone of the people standing in line waiting to buy a lottery ticket what they will do if they win.  The depth and detail of the answers are amazing.  The thought that has gone into planning should they win is often times very detailed and specific.

They know the house (or houses) they will buy, they know the cars they will drive,  They know the vacations they will take.  They know who they will share their winnings with, and more importantly know exactly who won’t be benefitting from their new found wealth.

In a lot of cases an exit strategy from their job is part of the tale. I always chuckle when I’m told how they will quit their job and what they will tell their boss.  I always enjoy the really descriptive tales that include telling their boss where to go and what to do when they get there.  I mean, come on, I guess if you win the big prize you’ve earned the right to tell off a person or two.

But let me change up the inquisition for a moment shifting it from lottery winner to career planning or family planning. Often times you’ll hear crickets long before the requisite Ummm or well that is typically followed by a “I don’t know.”

So you ask more specific questions.

What steps are you taking at work to move yourself forward or advance yourself?

What steps are you taking at home to engage your family in a plan that sees your family accomplishing more?

When challenged with what to do with a grand prize they will never win, a full and complete answer emerges, however when asked to define the steps taken to better ones life in the circumstances they have the ability to affect, normally stone cold awkward silence is tendered in place of an actual plan.

Here is what I can tell you.  Intentional people make plans for their lives using the circumstances of their lives as the tools and/or reason why they don’t want to stay stagnate.  Instead they choose to move their life forward to a different level than they are currently at.

Much like the person you interview in line waiting for their chance to part with hard earned money on a pipe dream called the lottery, intentional people can outline the who, what, where, when and how they intend to achieve the goals they have set forth for their lives.

In the interest of full disclosure I will tell you that I did buy a lottery ticket even though I know I won’t win.  However, let me poise this question to you this week.

In your life, is your lottery plan better thought out than your life plan?

Sure, we’d all love to win the lottery - and granted a fantasy that involves instant riches is fun to dabble in for a minute - but the truth is none of us will win the lottery.  

Here is the better bet though, a plan that takes into account the things in life you can control, moving you forward to achieve the goals you can achieve using the life you have been given.

Knowing you only get one spin on this thing we call earth, why not be intentional planning the things you can control.  I’d hate to get to the end of this thing looking back at ones life knowing that we didn’t accomplish the things we wanted to accomplish because of not winning the lottery.

So why not spend some time this week making a plan that you can win. 

Need help? 

Working with a Life Coach can help set you on a path for success.

And in the end, when you achieve those successes you can look back on a life well lived - even if you never picked the winning numbers. 

(Did you know you can get Monday Morning Minute delivered to your inbox every Monday morning?  Go to PSCoachTN.com and register to have Monday Morning Minute waiting for you each Monday as you start your work week.)